You left me in the ice

Detroit MI

Description

The heart breaking because you must watch the person you love more than anybody in the whole world repeatedly hurting you on purpose is perhaps the most painful thing one person can do to another. When it was true, when it was exciting, when it was consistent, when it was romantic, when it was terrifying, when it was raw passion, when it was authentic, when it was rare, when it was like heaven, (and most importantly) when it became a confession, it became real. But you didn't let me enter heaven with you. I waited outside the gates of heaven for you to come find me. But you used me to walk through those gates and left me stranded in limbo. Some heartbreaks will never heal. My heart was full of this infinite source of happiness and meaning, and I used every ounce of strength to feed you the attention, love, kindness and understanding you and I craved. The things we all crave as human beings. Nobody in this world wants to feel unwanted. None of us want to feel left behind, confused, ignored, or worthless. Especially in the eyes of those we love and respect the most. It is these people who have the power to wreck you forever, because you would have already let them in. You give them the key to unlock your heart but it comes at the risk of losing your heart forever when they decide to hop on a boat passing by, just so they can toss the key to your heart right before your eyes. Showing you where it was dropped to make you lose your mind. The key is gone. The ocean is large. The world is sad, dark, cold, empty. It feels like my soul is trapped beneath the bottom of the Atlantic. I suppose it is crazy of me to believe that this isn't what my destiny is. It would be crazy of me to suggest that there is another part to this story. It already ended, because you ended it. I'm still waiting for you at the bottom of this cold sea, lifelessly floating with my eyes staring towards the distant sun. How much lower does the ocean go down? How long will I keep descending into this clear blue limbo? If this is what life has come to, then it may be important to note that it's been so long and so difficult that I can barley keep my eyes open anymore. When the darkness consumes the faint light above me, and the sun can no longer reach the bottom surface I have now descended to, there isn't much to see. It's just blackness. Darkness. Damp. Cold. Quiet. It's lonely and I'm afraid. But this is what destiny had in store for me the day I said "I love you."