No pets! Exorbitant rent! Free companion if you're bad like me

Plymouth NH

Description

This is my girl, RedDog. She's free to a good home that: Doesn't own more than 1 property. You must make less than 3,000 a month OR your rent is 65% of your gross income or 50% of your net income, whichever is greater. OR be trapped in a 30 yr mortgage in which you have gotten the raw deal. You will be required to take a criminal background check. Should you have a clean record, you MUST commit at least 3 crimes in front of me personally. Drug use doesn't count! Drug screening will also be required but may be withdrawn upon successful completion of drugs. No children! No exceptions! Don't even bother me with your rancid crotch fruit that wants a living creature to love. What are even you doing? You're poor, you need to feed them, not a dog.