Tom

Salem OR

Description

Oh, how I miss you. Every. Day. Or maybe it was just the ideal of you? I don't know. There is not a day that I ache for you in some capacity. I was very well aware of the challenges a future with you would entail - but I welcomed it. Because even in obstacle it meant being with you, enduring it with you, taking life as it came with you as my partner. Maybe it was simply a state of my own delusion. I don't know. Maybe what I'm grasping at right now is purely the non existent embodiment of what I understood to be you. I don't know. Maybe I was purely a means of escapism for you. I don't know. What I do know is that I was left with the hope and desire and excitement of one future only to have another become a reality. How do you stop loving someone you let see you as you, in a rare vulnerable and unguarded state who seemed to accept you, flaws and all? The one who seemed to see past all the walls and all the false representations to the heart of who you truly are, and loved you for it. I don't know. What I do know is I still love you, I still miss you, and I still find myself hoping I'll see that coveted email from you. I can't help but wonder what I could have done differently. At the end of the day, though I hope you are well, I hope you are happy and I hope you have all you have ever wanted. I miss you.