Joe -- Please call me. lost my wedding band inside you

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New York City NY

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Joe, it's Gary. You are not taking my calls and I know you are upset but it's important you keep reading. I lost my wedding band and I think it slipped off when I was fisting you. Please don't poop in the toilet or it will be lost forever and it is of sentimental value related to my late wife. If you don't want to look through your poop just keep collecting it in bags for the next 5 days and leave them in the back. I will do the rest.

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