Love of my life.

Antelope CA

Description

There is nothing I can write here that will convey my feelings in a way that you'll ever truly understand. I miss you. I tried hiding the pictures of us I have on my wall. Tried seeing other people. Tried moving on. I've tried getting you off my mind, but no matter where I look... there you are. The other day I picked up the spatula and remembered all of the meals I made for you with it. My cast iron pan holds so many memories. I even bought new sheets hoping they would help me forget the countless nights we spent together.in our bed. You're gone now. You won't be coming back. I wish I coukd say I'm happy, that I've moved on and that I don't need you in my life anymore, but it would be a lie. I miss your feminine form shifting against me while I sleep. I miss holding you on the couch and letting you fall asleep in my lap. I miss rubbing the tension out of your shoulders and neck. I miss how you used to look at me to tell me you needed me to rub you. I miss the way you'd bite your lip when you were feeling playful. I miss the way your rub my chest at night while we slept, and how you'd throw your leg over me and snore so softly in my ear. Gentle cute little snoring love. Ugh. I miss it all. I have my regrets. I'm sure you have yours. We live and learn. I know you're well because we still talk a little. Not much. I knoe you won't read this because you don't scan craigstlist missed connections for my feelings lol. Who would? But it needed to be said today, I needed to write it somewhere where it would be possible for you to see if you wanted to see it. Some small hope that you ever loved me as much as I love you. I wouldn't ever send these to you directly anymore. I dont want to burden you with my sadness. I write here sometimes, so if you do see this maybe take a look from time to time.