Eunice my everything

Arcata CA

Description

There are some things I really hate to hear. Now I know they have zero to do with me and what other people say or feel has no effect on me. I do. I realize that people are entitled to feel how they feel and that even if it seems frustrating or ridiculous to me it is none of my business. However, I can not shake that there are certain things that just set me off. It's a me problem completely....except I know it's not something only I struggle with. I know that lots of us have similar trigger phrases/concepts. Maybe it's jealousy or envy or fomo. The why is probably not universal either. Each person has their own reasoning and reaction even if the same thing sets them off. No one probably cares what those things are and I'm not going to lay them all out here. I'm not even sure why I'm saying any of this, but I am. I'm tired. I'm worn out. I've been bubbly and supportive and tried to build bridges and reach across the aisle here for a long time. Yes, I've shared some of my struggles too and when I do break down I get some wonderful support. Then the next day comes and it's largely forgotten and I get it. It's all the way the world works. Well, it's the way my world works at least and I'm used to it. I can push on and give and do and survive. It's not worth being bothered over. It would be nice though to feel the way I'd like to feel. To feel sexy and desired. To feel worthy of attention and then actually get it. To have confidence instead of fake it. Maybe I wouldn't get triggered when I read those words. Then again, maybe I'd be saying those things and making someone else feel that way.