SECRET HOUSE PLANT SOCIETY

Portland OR

Description

It is really disturbing how the Oregonian recently called for an official state inquiry into the shadow world of Portland's secret house plant society. I do not want state investigators giving my phylodendron the 3rd degree or shaking it's leaves. The secret society of plants should be left alone. Some homes and plants were found to have bugs. Facebook has begun moving house plant profiles pages. Some people are now afraid to even talk to their plants. Several of favorite house plant specimens may have even voted for Biden in The 2020 election. No plant in this secret society ever voted for any green candidate or so we thought. Plants are supposed to mulch mail in ballots but now can't resist the free postage? There are reports of the department of agriculture water boarding some 🪴plants other plants have attempted to escape or go to seed. Governor Kate brown is reportedly having an affair with an under age spider plant and may have severed the attempts of a captive wandering jew to leave the state office building. The mother in law tongues are hush.