Dear Susan,

Portland OR

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Truly, I think deep down I probably love you. It was a damn mess with us, especially at the end, but if years later I'm still thinking about you regularly...I don't know what else that could mean. I guess maybe I won't know unless we were ever to connect again. And actually, that could happen. What I don't know is if we'd start swearing at one another and taking swings, or if we'd collapse in one another's arms and stop time with those perfect kisses. I've tried this before and you never respond, so I don't expect it now. But I wish/don't wish you'd email me.