More Than

Massapequa NY

25 April, 2021

Description

As the sunset lurks in the horizon. I think about a lot of things. I think, "I never wanted to be famous," and I laugh to myself, realizing "That's a good thing, because it never happened." Then I think about what I wanted: I suppose there was a time I wanted to be popular. I learned quickly it wasn't of great importance. I wanted to be loved, and I was, not always, but most of the days I enjoyed on this amazing earth. I wanted to laugh, and oh, I did often, but always at at another's humor. Humor was never one of my attributes, but I found it delightful whenever it crossed my path. I wanted adventure, but I didn't know how to find any. The companion and love of my life taught me where it was,. Together we shared so many during the years we walked together. I wanted to stop being afraid. That happened far too late in life, but it was a blessing when I learned how to lose fear. Perhaps it happened too late, however. I wanted to be kind, but it wasn't always easy. I didn't know I wanted children until they tumbled joyfully into my life, and then when they departed, I didn't know how desperately I would miss them. I tried hard not to weep. It always seemed to be such a performance. Then I learned sometimes tears are inevitable. I guess I wanted today to last forever, and of course, it doesn't, and perhaps shouldn't. I wish I had been wiser about the silent march of time. I did not know what I wanted, but now I know I was blessed to have even the unrecognized dreams come true. And as I watch the fading sun, I remember how incredibly blessed my life has been and I know I had more than I ever wanted. I wanted to love and I did.